I was driving fast, too fast perhaps

i was drunk and maybe my morals had lapsed

but i wasn't alone in that speeding car,

i had a feeling of joy and a miniature bar,

and i flowed round the bends like the sewage in drains

and bounced in the seat like big drops when it rains,

i careered round corners that were sanded down

with nout but some power and an upside down frown,

nothing could possibly go wrong here!

I shouted it out so that no-one could hear,

and pressed on the 'A' of the Able Bodied Cobra

and i wasn't sure which of my sides was soberer;

it was now pitch black like Number 10's door,

and I still had my right foot pressed to the floor,

and a glass in my left hand, a beer in my right,

i rounded the corner with a cry of delight,

but when i looked forward and steadied my gaze,

there was another in the world of my drink misted haze!

T'was a rabbit for sure, no doubt around there,

but it was not of the type you'd confuse with a hare,

for it was large and rotund, with bespectacled eyes,

and a pipe in it's mouth, and a gun to shoot flies,

it was a "he" for sure, that much was clear,

and he stood there smiling with an absence of fear

that was quite astounding, given the setting,

and with a calm little move he whipped out some netting,

and hung it wide across our highway

said "if we're going to do this, then we'll do it my way"

and at that he danced with astounding grace;

I went flying through the window right after my face,

and the rabbit made no attempt to run,

but instead calmly began loading his gun,

and whistled softly as I lay there battered

my car in a heap and my dinner suit tattered,

and once he'd finished and i saw him up close

i realised that he was in fact a farmer's fence post,

and the net which had struck me as right from the sea

was in fact the chicken wire between the post and a tree,

and i now knew everything except from one,

and that was "who was it wielding the gun"?

and i couldn't work it out, and my time was going,

and the wind picked up speed and the moon it was glowing,

a voice said to me from the back of my head:

"don't drink and drive son, when you should be in bed,

'cos this is what'll happen, you'll meet me at night,

and there's no-one but rabbits to hear of your plight,

the last thing you'll think before the door's closed on your face,

will be that you overestimated your human race,

because as we rabbit's know, it's NOT a big rush",

then He pulled on the trigger and my head turned to mush.